WARNING: very longwinded detailed version of Ray's birth story. Also I'm super bummed that we didn't have a real camera in the room so all the pictures posted are taken from a few of our phones so some of them really suck. I need a real camera already.
Thursday July 25, 2013 I had a doctors appointment in Kaneohe.
The appointment I'd had the previous week I had been dilated to a 3. The doctor was surprised and told us she thought I'd just go into labor naturally within the next few days. Well that didn't happen and a whole week later I'd had no contractions (that I could feel anyways) and my water hadn't broke. So that Thursday came and I had told AJ to go to work even though he really wanted to skip work and come to the appointment with me in case I found out I was going to have baby. But since I hadn't been having any signs of going into labor any time soon I told him to just go to work and I'd see him after. I was working at my dad's office with my mom that day and she wanted to come with me too in case anything happened, but she got busy with work and couldn't come. I told her it was ok and since my sister, Melissa and her family, were flying in that day I'd come back after my appointment and pick them up with her or see them all after my appointment. Melissa really wanted to come for baby's birth and she had been telling me to hold him in until she got there.
Anyways I got to the doctors office and the first thing I told my doctor, Dr. Clark, was that I was kind of worried because since my last appointment I hadn't felt baby move as much as he used to and even at night when he was usually really active, he wasn't. So she said that could be a sign of my body not supporting the pregnancy as much anymore because baby was getting big and I was close to the end. But to make sure she did an ultrasound to check my fluids. (SIDENOTE: I was surprised when I found out that not everyone has an ultrasound every doctors visit they went to. Because my doctor did one for every single visit. So we saw our son every month moving around and doing his thing and then every 2 weeks and then every week up until his birth. That was always my favorite part of our visit, seeing him on the screen and hearing his beautiful little heart flutters) But back to my fluids...she said you normally have 4 big pockets of fluids and that one of my pockets was empty (which how does that even happen when your water hasn't broken yet? Where does/did the water go?). She said my fluid levels were at a 6 and anything under a 5 is not good, so I was ok but still that would be another reason why I hadn't felt my son move as much. Then she checked my dilation and I was at a 4. She was surprised I hadn't been having contractions or broke my water because she said I was progressing good enough. After that she sat down and said because of my fluids and not being able to feel baby moving as much that I could go ahead and head over to Castle Hospital and have the baby. ".....yeah..yeah..ok...WAIT WHAT?!! You mean today?! But I came here all alone and I don't want to go to the hospital alone, and I don't have my overnight bag ready and I didn't bring anything with me and I have class tonight....." That's what I was thinking in my head. Because I envisioned going into labor Thursday night or Friday morning AFTER my class that way I could have baby over the weekend and have a day or two to recover and then be back in class Tuesday and not have to miss a day of school. I hate missing school. I almost asked her if we could do it the next day so that I could go to class. But then I remembered how worried I had been feeling and how sad it made me when I wouldn't feel my son and I'd sit really still just waiting for a little kick or nudge anywhere to confirm he was still alive in there. So I decided doctor knows best. She told me to just go straight to the hospital and that my husband and family would have plenty of time to get there since I wasn't going into labor immediately. So I told her I would go straight to the hospital...which is like 20 min or less away. But then I went out to my car and called my mom. My mom was kind of surprised and I told her I didn't want to go to the hospital alone and I was going to call AJ and pick him up from his job site.
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| What my app that day (Friday) was telling me was true! |
So I picked up AJ who happened to conveniently be working in Kahaluu that day. I filled him in on what was going on. As I was driving I started to freak out a little because I couldn't believe the day was finally here. I started to feel light headed and kind of shaky and I was kind of yelling at AJ telling him he should be driving cuz I didn't feel good. It was sinking in. We went back to Pearl City, we both showered and grabbed our bags. I ate an apple. We stopped at Jamba Juice too because I was hungry. It was so weird to be heading to the hospital to have a baby, our baby. We both kept talking about how unreal it was as we held hands on our way there. I was so glad I wasn't going to the hospital alone. We finally got there around 3 or 3:30. We checked in and got into our room and I got all changed and hooked up to an IV. They told me they were going to start me on pitocen and then the waiting game began. Dr. Clark stopped by and she told me that she had called the hospital a little while after I left and asked if I had checked in yet and they told her I hadn't so she was confused because I should have been there already. I told her I didn't want to come alone so I had gone to get my husband and she laughed and said it was totally fine she just thought something bad might have happened. The nurse said they were going to up the pitocen kind of fast so they'd come in every hour or half hour and up the dosage, but I wasn't feeling any bad contractions. They told me I was having them because they could see it on the screen, but to me it didn't feel that bad so I didn't really even know I was having them. And they joked that I obviously wasn't feeling it because I was still smiling and happy. haha
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| When I was still happy and painless. |
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| I really liked Castle. It was so nice, big, and comforting. |
Melissa, Teki, Lusi and Baby Ti came to visit after they got in and I told Meliss that baby waited for her to get her. They hung out for a little while. It was so cute when Lusi first walked in she said, "Baby Tousin" (Baby Cousin) and she still calls him that. While they were there the nurse called my doctor because my contractions weren't progressing with the pitocen since I didn't feel them getting stronger. My doctor told them to stop the pitocen for a while like an hour and a half and then start me back on it again and to up it very slowly. By that time we had been there for about 5 or 6 hours and I was freaking hungry. I asked the nurse if I could eat something and she told me they don't normally let anyone eat anything because once labor starts they usually throw it up. But we were starting the whole process over again and I was so hungry so I was like "even a cracker will do, I'm just really hungry" so she said she'd call Dr. Clark. She came back with apple juice, crackers, and a popsicle which she said was all Dr. Clark said I could eat. I was totally fine with that, except Lusi wanted to eat all my food with me so the nurse went and got a little extra for Lusi too. After that everyone left to go get some rest. I told my mom I'd call them when my contractions started getting bad so that Melissa and her could come back. Then it was just me and AJ again.
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| Lusi kept wanting to sit on the bed with her FAVORITE aunty. lol |
We waited, watched tv, and tried to rest. Which was easy for him, but I like how all the nurses kept telling me to "try and get some rest"but then how can I when they are literally coming in every 30 min to check on me and my vitals. Not to mention my butt was SO DEAD it was nearly impossible to find a comfortable position and then when I would I moved so much that my monitor on my belly listening to the baby's heart would move and then a nurse would come in to move it back into a spot so they could hear baby's heart. (Once when the nurse was in the room I laughed and she said baby liked when I laughed cuz she could see how his heart responded on the screen when I laughed, I liked that.) Plus the constant drip of fluids into my body made me have to pee every freaking hour and going to the bathroom when you're connected to a billion wires isn't easy. I kept having to have AJ help me unplug from the machine and the wall so I could go to the bathroom. When it started getting late AJ fell asleep on the couch and was snoring SO LOUD so that was just another thing keeping me from sleeping. Plus when I needed him to help me to the bathroom I literally had to yell to wake him up...I kept imagining and wishing I had something I could throw at him to wake him up......cuz I was a little irritated that he was sleeping and I wasn't. So basically very restless sleep for me.
Around 4 in the morning I started getting contractions I could feel and THEY FREAKING HURT! I had already talked to the nurses and told them I was doing this natural and not to mention any pain meds because I wasn't going to use them. I really wanted to do it natural because my mom had and so did my sister and I just think our bodies were made to do this so I could handle it. Plus I just don't like the idea of putting things into my body that it doesn't need...except for candy, it always needs that. haha, but I'm speaking medicine wise here. So I called my mom and she said her and Melissa would be on their way. The pain was not what I expected, I mean I didn't expect it to be pleasant, but I wasn't expecting THAT. I didn't feel any pain in my abdomen, it was ALL in my lower back and hips. Every single contraction I felt like my hips were pulling apart. I would watch the little screen and see when contractions were starting and I'd want to cry. I realized that they were really bad for 30 seconds and then after that they'd start to fade away. So I'd watch the clock and time it for 30 seconds and if I could just get through those 30 seconds I knew I'd be ok. It was then that I remember thinking and asking my mom and sister why people have more than one baby, because after that kind of pain who would want another one? And the whole time during my contractions I was convinced I would never have another baby after because I never wanted to feel that kind of pain again. I didn't cry though, I just frowned, whimpered and felt like crying, but no tears came out. I didn't even yell at AJ or anyone. I just watched the clock and tried to control my breathing. My nurse told me I was doing so good and handling the pain so well. I did throw up a couple times. The first time I said I thought I was going to throw up they didn't have anything for me to throw up in right there and the nurse had to scramble around getting me a little bucket thing while I tried to hold it in until she got it. Aj was more grossed out by the throwing up than he was by the whole birth lol.
This is me being a baby because I was in so much pain.
At 6:00 my nurse said she would call my doctor since my contractions were getting bigger and I was dilated to a 7 I think...or maybe a 5 or 6? cant remember. Then she told me my doctor would be in at 7:00. I thought I was going to die having to wait another hour. 7:00 came and my doctor wasn't there and I remember getting kind of mad thinking where is she?! I think she showed up at 7:15ish. My water still hadn't broken but my contractions were so close together and I can't remember if I was dilated to a 9 before or after she broke my water. But soon after she got there and broke my water I told her I felt like I needed to push. She said ok and so I started pushing at about 7:40.
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| My chart. |
There was Dr. Clark, 2 nurses (the one who helped deliver, her name was Sarah and she was great! Definitely my favorite nurse), Aj, my mom, and Melissa in the room. So my mom and Meliss were helping to hold my legs and Aj was by my side and then they would rotate between helping hold my legs or just watching. I didn't take any birthing classes or even read or watch anything that would help me know what to do during labor and pushing, I figured my body would just tell me when to push. My nurse and Dr. told me to hold all my breath in and use it to push when I pushed. Each contraction we did 3 pushes and my Dr. counted out loud to 10 for each push. That was really hard. A few times I felt like I wasn't getting enough air because they told me to hold my breath in when I push then I was given like 1 second to get a new breath of air and then had to push again for 10 seconds holding my breath in. Doing that 3 times in a row was hard. During one contraction my Dr. counted to 10 once then she said ok again, but I just said "noooo, I need to breathe, I feel like I'm not getting enough air." My Dr. was awesome she was really calm and just kept telling me how great I was doing. My mom told me after that she thought I was going to pass out because my face was so red from how hard I was pushing. I just really wanted him out of me already so I was pushing the hardest I could. Dr. Clark told me when she could see his head that he had a lot of hair! And then she touched his head and she saw that his heart rate responded to the touch. That was cool. The last few pushes I remember feeling discouraged because I could feel him coming out a little but then when I stopped pushing he would go back in. I was just so focused on pushing him out and was probably a little light headed from all the pushing. So the last push when he came out and everyone was saying "his heads out, his heads out" I almost didn't believe that I could see his tiny head with all that black hair.
Baby Ray Siosiua Tuineau was born at 8:26am on July 26th 2013, his EXACT due date.
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| They gave him a pink bow beanie at first and I thought it was funny. |
They immediately put baby on my chest and Aj told me after that I just kept saying "oh my gosh! oh my gosh!" over and over. I was FREAKING out. AJ was crying, I think I was in shock, and I don't even know what my mom and melissa were doing. I think my mom cried... I don't remember. I don't even remember what I was doing.
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| Cousins reunited on Earth! |
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| With Aunty Melissa. |
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| Those lips. |
I really liked that they immediately gave him to me. They told me before hand that they would give him to me and he could eat and just stay with me until I was ready to give him to them so they could weigh him and give him a bath. I think I kept him for about 20 min. It was amazing. I fed him for the first time and I just stared and stared at him. But I remember I kept saying "I don't know what I'm doing" like when the nurse told me to try to feed him, and then she had to help me. haha I had ripped when he came out so Dr. Clark had to stitch me up and I didn't even care that she was or that it was hurting because I had a beautiful brand new baby to distract me. I held him till after she was done. Then I gave him over so that they could clean him up. He weighed 6 lbs 14 oz and he was 19 1/2 inch long! I was so exhausted. It was funny cuz I was the center of attention that whole time then as soon as baby came I was left sitting on the bed by myself and everyone was over on the other side of the room taking pictures of baby getting weighed and getting a bath. I remember thinking "Hey, I'm here too!" haha I didn't mind though, I would have been over there too if I could have moved.
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| Another feeling forgotten moment while everyone was swooning over our fresh baby. |
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| I was envious of all the sleep he was getting. |
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| In LOVE. |
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| Amazing. |
After things finally settled down and my family left and it was just me, AJ, and baby I kept telling him, "We have a baby..." and we'd just stare at each other and at him and it was the strangest feeling. I couldn't sleep even though I was beyond tired. When I went to the bathroom I noticed I had a few red spots in my eyes and then I later noticed I also had red spots all up and down my cheeks and neck. I asked my nurse what it was and she told me it's from pushing so hard and that it would go away. I'm assuming it was popped blood vessels, I told you I was pushing freaking hard! But I finally slept for maybe an hour, then we had to move upstairs to another room because the birthing center was so full that we couldn't stay in the room.
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| Lusi just loved him. She still calls me now asking about "baby tousin" :) |
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| Brand new baby and brand new daddy! |
Apparently that was the weekend to have babies, and it was because that day and the few days following it I knew about 5 or 6 other people on facebook who had their babies also. It was a wonderful weekend to have a baby! I even had a friend who I worked with we found out we were pregnant at around the same time and right after we moved upstairs she texted me and told me she was in the hospital too to have her baby! Finally that night I slept and it was so good. Saturday morning Aj went with Ray to get him circumcised and AJ said, "he took it like a champ." He didn't cry at all. We checked out of the hospital that Saturday afternoon. We went straight to the Walgreens drive thru to fill my prescriptions, while we waited we went to panda express cuz poor AJ was neglected in the hospital the whole time and was starving except when my mom would bring him food. So we sat inside Panda and ate with our brand new baby and my gimpy slow walking self. Then we picked up my prescriptions and went to Pearl City to stay at my parents house.
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| My mom and dad with Ray |
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| They gave him a new beanie after he got circumcised and I just thought it was the cutest ever on Ray. |
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| They been napping together since day 1, literally. |
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| Blurry pic of us walking out the hospital with our heavenly new baby! |
The next day we went to church at my parents ward where everyone thought I was nuts for being there instead of being at home, but I felt like going to church and not sitting on my butt anymore. Then the next day Monday we went to the mall with my sister, thinking back I should have relaxed a little more, but I just wanted to go back to normal already. Tuesday we went back to Laie and I went to class, my teacher was surprised to see me, but like I said I hate missing class. Plus I felt like I was recovering quickly and totally fine to be out and about. Something weird was adjusting to being a mom. I kept saying out loud and in my head when I'd talk to my son, "Aunty's going to change your diaper" or for whatever I was doing. I was so used to being an aunty it was weird to have my own baby, my own son. So yeah, thats the story of how my little one came to be on Earth. He has changed my whole world. I feel nothing but total love when I look at his little face. I'm a mom now, it's pretty cool.
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| Baby Ray's first time to church! |
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| I told you this girl just loves him! She would have smothered him if she was allowed to! |
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| I just love the cousin love. |
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| Here he is a few days old...natural born poser that's for sure! |
About that last picture since we were in the hospital my doctor and another doctor and some of the nurses mentioned how expressive Ray was because he pulled a lot of faces for a newborn. And it's true he has always made a ton of faces and furrowed his eyebrows since the day he was born. I have a ton of pictures of him doing different faces. It's pretty funny maybe I'll post them sometime. Anyways I just think he has such a cute little face even with his big old tongan nose! haha that's the first thing we all noticed "Well he got daddy's nose that's for sure" is what we all said. haha although the doctor told us his nose was a bit swollen from coming out through my you know what and that it would go down, and it did a little bit, but let's be honest he still got that tongan nose lol. But I noticed and some other people have mentioned that he didn't really ever have that newborn look, he came out with some distinct features and I think I have to agree, he kind of had mature features that made him not look so newborn like. I just love him so much. Everyone says how they never knew they could love someone so much.... but I believed my parents when they said we would never understand until we had our own children someday, and I do. I understand now. It's completely incredible.
THINGS I WISH SOMEONE HAD TOLD ME BEFORE I GAVE BIRTH:
-Eat something before you go into the hospital even if the doctor tells you not to. Labor is hard and being hungry the whole time leading up to it makes it even worse.
-STOOL SOFTENER. Request it as soon as you're in the hospital. My nurses didn't offer me any and I had to actually request it from them after birth and then they only gave me one the whole time I was in there. That first poop after birth when I went home was a biiiiiiiitch. I cried. Yes, actual tears....that didn't even happen in the hospital. I was on the toilet for almost an hour. No one told me you'd be afraid to go to the bathroom after everything.
-Your poor boobs. No one explicitly told me how horrible breast feeding is the first couple of weeks. I literally would be kicking my legs in pain while feeding my baby. Lanolin breast cream for your nipples will be your best friend and you will dread feeding time, BUT it gets so much better.
-Bring food/snacks for your husband and for yourself after you have baby. Poor Aj was starving and the hospital food was pretty gross, my favorite thing was the fruit.
-It is hard to sit down. From just laying on the bed for hours on end my butt was perma dead and sore, then after birth it was even harder.
-Let's hope your husband knows how to change a diaper. I didn't change one diaper the entire time I was in the hospital because I just couldn't really move around at all. Aj even had to help me shower/get dressed/go bathroom. I love my husband for that. He was the best at helping with EVERYTHING. But I'm sure if he doesn't know how to change a diaper the nurses would be more than happy to help.
hmm and I think that's all I can remember. If I had blogged right after it happened like I should have then I'd probably remember more, but I'm sure as some of you already know life is busy when you're a momma. My days have been occupied by this cute little babe who has captured my heart. I love everything about my new family.
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| Our very first photo as a family. |
